Exhibition Projects 3: The question youneed to ask yourself is what are you willing to give up to live the life youwant?

As children, wehad to ask for permission from our parents or caretakers to do what we wanted.Whether it was hanging out with friends, going outside, or whatever rules wereplaced on us, we had to ask. And being children, this was often important tokeep us safe.

But many of uscarry this need into adulthood. We believe we need permission from our parents,friends, and even society when it comes to living the life we want. We hold onto tradition — the tradition of what everyone else has done and what everyoneelse believes we should do.

The problem is wegive up what we want as individuals. We seek permission from others about howto live our lives. We seek approval for what we should study in college, whatjob we should take, and which partner we should date. And we want to followwhat others deem to be “best” for us.

I understand a lotof wanting to seek permission is based on respect for the person whom we areseeking permission from. But if it goes against what you want, you are notrespecting yourself and your life.

Becausecontinually seeking permission (and approval) from others will not make youhappy. Eventually, you will realize you have been living your life for others,and you’ve missed out on the life you wanted. “There is no greater agony thanbearing an untold story inside you.”

Whether you are 26or 46, your life is yours. You may seek the advice of peers and family, but thedecision on how you should live life is yours. There may be consequences toyour decisions, but you don’t need permission to live your life how you seefit. And despite what we are told all the time, being selfish on occasion issomething which is healthy.

You will makemistakes, and you will make some stupid decisions. I have. But it is all partof growth and finding out who you are and what you want. It is part of livingyour own life and figuring out what it means to you.

When you start tofigure out what you want in life, you may change your mind about a lot of thethoughts you previously had. And you also have permission to do that.

You havepermission to change your mind about whatever. It doesn’t matter. It could bepolitics, religion, pursuing a career, or a college major. It’s alright tochange your mind. Not only is it alright it’s a right. It’s your right.

You don’t have toseek permission to live your life or change your mind, and you also need to bea little stubborn when it comes to living the life you want. I’m not saying tonot seek advice or wisdom from those who may have more experience, but theirlife is not yours. Their experience does not equate to what is best for you —only you can determine that. And usually, their want for you comes from a placeof fear — their fear. But you can’t let their fear be yours.

To live how youwant, there must be a willingness to give up certain things like tradition, the“normal”, and what others want you to do. You will face detractors and peoplewho believe you are crazy.

The question youneed to ask yourself is what are you willing to give up to live the life youwant?

That will be up toyou and only you.

But remember, youhave permission to live the life you want. It’s already in your hands. It’sbeen granted. You just have to find what that life looks like.